We went for more "Brandi time:-)" on May 27th. It was another fabulous day of hearing that perfect heartbeat and seeing that perfect little boy on the screen. It's odd to me that now when I see the screen the first thing I notice is the visible heartbeat, yet somehow at the last ultrasound with Joshua and Caleb I didn't notice that there wasn't a heartbeat. I guess I've learned a lot since then. My eyes are glued to it now.
His heartbeat was 150 bpm and he was measuring 17 weeks 4 days.
He looked perfect. I'm starting to be able to see my placenta on the ultrasound now. It's clearly getting bigger. It is in the front so it acutally seems to make it harder to see the baby on the ultrasound but it is functioning perfectly so I'll take it.
I go back for a regular visit on Wednesday, 6/10/09. This is a normal visit for everyone. This is when she will measure everything and I'll see the doctor again. Sometimes I find myself worried but I think it is because we are getting close to the point in the pregnancy where I lost the boys. We found out Joshua and Caleb were gone at 20 weeks 5 days and delievered them at 20 weeks 6 days. That point in this pregnancy is getting much closer. Now I know there is no "safe" zone but that was our end zone last time so I guess that is what I'll forever look forward to getting past. I struggled a little with week 18 too though. One of the moms that I've talked to online who lost her little boy around the time I lost Joshua and Caleb had a second loss at 18 weeks. She lost another boy. Something about her 18 week mark bothered me. I guess just the fact that she has gone through this loss twice is hard to comprehend. I pray that we aren't faced with that pain but I know God would see us through it if we were.
I'll keep you posted after our next appointment.