Working

Why is it that the minute you go back to work it seems like you don't have time to do anything anymore.  I so much enjoyed having the time off to do the things I never got to do before.  At least when I was teaching I knew there was an end or a break to look forward to.  A point where you got to start over with a new group.  With this "normal person" job there is none of that.

I feel like I'm treading water.  I haven't had the time to update my blog, to make cards, to keep up with all the amazing moms on the support group boards, and most difficult is keeping up my relationship with God.  I feel like I squeeze my daily Bible readings in at the end of each day, not to mention the fact that I'm three days behind.  

The weekends seem to come and go with no time or motivation to get these things done.  That is what I hate about working full-time.  Then there is another part of me that is just thankful. I'm thankful that God has always provided for Wayne and I.  I have so many friends and friends of friends that have lost their jobs in this less-than-stellar-economy and it serves an instant reminder of how blessed I am to have this job.  

So how is the new job, you may be wondering.  Well that's a difficult answer to give.  It is just SO different than anything I've ever done.  I'm working with so many adults and I have to say that I'm just not used to that.  I went from sharing a classroom with 27 little people to sharing a tiny cube with at least 3 other adults.  I choose the classroom, no offense if anyone from work should ever find this:-)  I am just used to having more space and while I shared it with so many other children, it was still mine and I had authority over the space...does that sound slightly tyrantish of me???  Ok I admit it, I liked being in charge of my space.  But with that charge came A LOT of stress.  It was full of working late and bags of work that went home with me (no they didn't always make it into the house but I always carried them back and forth).  I guess my answer comes down to this... there are things about teaching that I truly miss, mainly being surrounded by the overall innocence of children, and there are things I don't' miss, namely the stress.  There are things I equally don't love about this job, like the lack of innocence from adults, but there are the things that I love too.  I LOVE that I don't have to think about what to put on in the morning because I pretty much wear two pair of scrubs all week and jeans on Fridays.  I LOVE that I can go to the bathroom anytime I want and I SO enjoy the "grown-up" lunches, although these aren't helping the whole weight issue; and at times I feel a little guilty because I pack Wayne's lunch every day yet I end up going out to eat most days.  That might not be fair but of course he never complains.  I also have to say that the stress of this job is NO WHERE near teaching (at least at this point) and I love that.  I've got a lot to learn but I'm enjoying it most days in this new pharmaceutical world.