First Birthday Invitation

So I'm officially in denial that Case is turning one very soon. He is 3 days away from being 11 months but if someone asked me today how old he is I'd say 10 months. I'm holding on as long as I can. It's getting so close though. I had to get his invitation ready so it could be printed and I could get it mailed the first of October. His birthday is actually close enough that I need to send his invitations out... that blows my mind. If I was a more organized mom I probably should have already sent them out. So here is what his birthday invitation looks like...

We decided to have his party the day before his actual birthday (Halloween) because we have too much to do on the 31st. We're having it at my mom's house and my cousin is making his cake. That is the extent of the details so far. Invitations, location, cake... not bad :-) Now I just have to keep it together and let him grow up!

He's on the Move!

Case has taken his walking to a whole new level! When we are at home he is everywhere! He just glows when he's walking. He looks so happy. He started to really take off last weekend on Sunday, September 5, 2010. Now he looks like he's been doing it all of his life. He just continues to amaze me with all the milestones he keeps hitting.

Happy 2nd Birthday Joshua and Caleb

Two years ago today my twins, Joshua and Caleb, were silently born. I say silently because there were no cries and there were no coos. My boys were stillborn. I find it very easy to go back to that day however I don't live there anymore. Much has happened since the day we lost our boys and the blessings are the first thing that come to mind. Many wonderful people have come into our lives that we would not have otherwise met. Relationships have been built on something much stronger than small talk. They've been built on a shared experience that left lives changed forever. God took our boys from us that day but He also gave us all that we needed to carry on. He drew us closer to Him. He brought us relationships with people that would help carry our burden. He blessed us with family that gave us time to heal and loved us through it all. He gave us the memories we have of holding our little boys. He gave us much. He gave me Summer.

Summer lost her little boy, Caleb (part of our immediate connection) not long after our boys were born. We don't live in the same town. We didn't share common friends. God brought us together through a discussion forum on iVillage. We became immediate friends. I have relied on her a lot through my healing process. She continues to be a beacon of strength for me. God has not eased her pain with another baby like He has for me; however He's given her strength, courage, and comfort that has continued to carry her through. I am so encouraged by how she continues to keep her faith in Him even when it seems like He might not hear her.

Marlena, our nurse, has also been another gift from God. She was there for Joshua and Caleb's birth as well as Case's. If I know Marlena, she'll do all that she can to be there for any future babies as well. It is extremely comforting to be surrounded by someone who intimately lived what we went through during Joshua and Caleb's birth when we had Case. She totally understood all of the emotions. She's always there for me if I need her and that hasn't changed in the two years since they were born.

I also have the support of a group of people that all have shared a similar experience. They make up the support group that we began attending soon after we lost the boys. It's another place I can go where I know they all get it. Andy, Sarah, Wanetta, Barron, Deanna, Bobbi, Kelly, Jennifer, Pam, I love you guys!!!

God's blessings continued today. Two years after God took them home I can still feel Him working in our lives giving us the gift of peace and comfort that only He can give. The weather today was as beautiful as the day of their funeral. We had a lot of family out there today because they were all camping for the long weekend. They all joined us at the cemetery (right next to my brother's property where we camp). We decorated their grave and sang happy birthday. It was all very neat to me because here was a group of people that all came together to remember my boys. Thank you God for this support. My love to you all, Mom, Dad, Aunt Cathy, Uncle Rick, Lori, John, Bethany, Rickey, and Aunt Karen. You all made this day very special for us!!!

Case and Daddy on their way to Joshua and Caleb's grave

Decorating their headstone

Our family decorating their headstone

All the wonderful people that helped us celebrate

Our family

Case is 10 Months!

Somehow my little tiny baby turned 10 months old two days ago. How does this happen and where does the time go???

Everyday I just can't help but think about how much fun he is. This morning I heard him making his favorite "oooh" and "aaah" noises only to find him just sitting in the bathroom. He was very entertained by just being in there making noise and thought it was so funny that I found him. I think he was trying to hide from me. I guess we have some work to do on the not making noise so they don't find you part of that game.

He's about had all that he wants of baby food now. He'll still usually eat it but would much rather eat off of your plate. His eating habits are ahead of his teeth though. He still only has the two teeth on the bottom in the middle. The doctor said his gums on top were swollen when we were there two weeks ago but I probably won't know they're in until it hurts when he bites on on both sides of my finger instead of just the bottom. He's probably the biggest beggar out there... don't think that you're going to sit down and eat anything if he isn't having some too.

His newest trick is that he LOVES playing the piano. First of all, how is he even tall enough to reach the piano??? He started this on the day he turned 10 months. I guess he thought it was time for a new trick! This makes Daddy VERY happy. It's so cute... he uses both hands. I think he is already better than me and I'm pretty sure Daddy agrees.


Case also loves to climb into the refrigerator anytime he can get there before you shut the door. It's no longer enough just to look inside... he needs to become one with the refrigerator. Even the spill out of the refrigerator that he took the other day hasn't deterred him from it. He's quite the climber!


He still loves to walk although he will only do it on his own for a few steps and totally on his terms. If he's facing me and I'm walking backwards he thinks it's funny to chase me. He can go pretty far without falling into me but he hasn't figured that out yet. Once he realizes he's walking without help he immediately sits down.

I can't believe we are two months away from his first birthday! I still find myself looking at him in awe. I can't believe God blessed me with little boy. I'm loving being his mom and spending every moment that I can with him. He keeps me busy and leaves me sleepy at the end of the day but I love every minute of my time with him!!!

Thank you God for my amazing husband and my sweet little boy! We are loving life together!!!